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I had a wonderful weekend but I ate way too much. More then I have eaten in a long time (at least the last 8 months). It was really nice to give myself a little break the past three days but now I feel gross. Really, really gross.
I kind of feel like a greasy bloated pig. Seriously. Maybe it is because it is midnight and I just consumed half a can of reduced fat pringles. I don't know why my husband brings them into the house. He has to know by now that he won't get many of them. I think he is trying to sabotage me. :) He also brought home a HUGE pumpkin whoopee pie on Sat. How mean is that. Of course I ate it. My daughter ate 1/3 of it but I still consumed at least 15 points worth. That baby was huge! I know that he is not really trying to sabotage me. He is just being sweet but sometimes it is so hard for me to resist things.
In a perfect world there would be no kids crying, no money issues, plenty of sleep and plenty of time to yourself. I could so resist temptation in those conditions. But under normal conditions like these, baby with croup, cranky 4 year old, not enough money, kids crying, house to clean, not enough time to exercise, no time to your self, and not enough sleep, are the times that I get myself in trouble.
On Saturday I spent all morning cleaning my girls room. Cleaning toys, washing sheets, washing clothes, putting clothes away, packing all the clothes away that don't fit and then getting all of the fall clothes out and put away. By 1pm I came down stairs to eat some low fat spaghetti that I made the day before and my husband says he got me a surprise. As the kids where clinging to me and crying that they were hungry my husband pulls out this giant pumpkin whoopee pie. At that point I was so hungry and stressed that I stood in the kitchen and ate it in about 2 minutes. When things calmed down after lunch I thought "What did I just do?" "Why did I eat that?". I don't really even know what happened.
Stress just comes over me and I eat. It is really something that I have been working on throughout my journey and obviously something I will always struggle with. For now I have realized that it is just better to keep unhealthy food out of the house. I even asked my husband not to bring me food as a treat anymore. :(.
And that was just the start of my weekend. I ate brownies at my sisters. A food that once I eat one I can't stop. I unusually try to avoid them at all costs but for some reason I let my guard down and ate one (or 6). Then we went to a wonderful pig roast on Sunday where I ate more food then you would ever think possible for someone my size. And then today we had a picnic at my parents with tons of great food and yet again I couldn't control myself.
So enough is enough. I had my fun and now I feel gross. Tomorrow starts a new day and it is going to be a good one. I am going to the gym and I plan to eat tons of veggies and fruit. I may even have a couple no carb days just to get back on track (it is so hard to not eat carbs). I think it may be what I need to make my body feel a little better.
I am going to try to go to the gym every day for the rest of the week. So that and the no carbs should kick be back into my good habits and make me feel more energized and less sluggish.
Sorry to ramble on. I had such an off plan weekend that I thought I should share it all with you. This is part of life and as long as we get back on track we will be fine. We can't let ourselves get discouraged or get mad at ourselves. This is life and if we get discouraged we are more likely to just give up and keep eating unhealthy and not exercising.
I just need to get my act back together tomorrow (technically today) and remember why I am doing this. I want to be healthy and strong, I want to feel good about myself and I want to show my children healthy eating habits. This is why I am going to keep going and get back on track tomorrow.